Final Fantasy 7-Meets-Final Fantasy 8 (EEK!)
by Moi -D
Summary: God help Aeris when she tries to teach a class composed of Squall Yuffie and Zell!!!! The final chapter is uploaded!! If you want the video to go with any of these (except for the GF summon deathmatch) E mail me!!!! ^_^ This has been fun to write.
1. Materia...Drugs...I see no difference. ^...

Moi ô¿ô: My muse, Person 1 has finally shown himself! HAHAHAA! Now I can force him to inspire me whenever I want!  
Person 1: Whew...Thanks for saving me man. Yuffie was starting to scare me...  
Yuffie: GRR!! What do I do for a muse!?  
Moi ô¿ô: Inspire yourself with this. *hands Yuffie a tarantula*  
Yuffie: EEK!! *trips onto the Red Fic-Start lever*  
The Fic Begins.  
  
Final Fantasy 7-Meets-Final Fantasy 8 (Warning: This could Get Ugly)  
  
Part One- Materia Or Junction?!?!?  
  
By Moi ô¿ô (And the crew of Random Acts Of Insanity!)  
  
Disclaimer: Moi ô¿ô owns nothing mentioned in this fic, expecpt for part of the soon-to-be TV show, Random acts of Insanity!! See Author profile for copyright info.  
  
Irvine paces back and forth in his and Squall's room, in an unusual blue trench coat.  
  
Squall: Stay back!! *trips up the stairs, pointing his gunblade at the door*  
  
Rinoa (On the other side pf the door): But I want a huuuuuuuug!!!!!!  
  
Irvine: Squall.....You too huh?  
  
Squall: That woman is driving me insane....  
  
Irvine: *holds up large locks of his hair, which are peculiarly rippled * Selphie got ahold of the curlers! Look!  
  
Squall: What the?? *stares*  
  
Irvine: If she gets ahold of the curlers one more time....*shakes his clenched fist*  
  
Squall: *looks Irvine over* Why are their hearts on your unsusal blue trench coat?  
  
Irvine: Why do you think?  
  
Squall: *nodds sympathecitally*  
  
Irvine: Selphie stole my gun.....I would have done anything. Anything to put a bullet right through her head, and she went and stole my gun.  
  
Squall: Here, man. *hands Irvine his gun blade*   
  
Irvine: *gets all big-eyed, and manic* Oh, Selphieeeeeeeeeeeeee!  
  
????: THUD!  
  
Squall and Irvine look around.  
  
Squall: The sound effects guy was fired wasn't he?  
  
????: I said THUD!!!!  
  
Squall and Irvine look over to the nearby bed where none other that YUFFIE sits, under a large hole in the roof.  
  
Yuffie: Damn emergency exit! *realizes that Squall is pointing his gun blade at her throat* Uhhh....hi!  
  
Squall: *monotone* Who are you?  
  
Yuffie: *leans over in Irvine's direction* Sup?  
  
Squall: Where did you come-*Yuffie grabs his gun blade*  
  
Yuffie: Where's the materia? *looks the gun blade over thouroughly* There're no materia slots!! That sucks!  
  
Squall: Is materia a drug?  
  
Irvine: Probably...But look...*points to Yuffie* Its another one of those damn women!  
  
Squall: ..........*looks at Yuffie again* Are you sure?  
  
Yuffie: I'm a GIRL!!  
  
Irvine: Yeah...I'm sure..that annoying sound! Her hair could almost be Selphie's!  
  
Yuffie swings her hair, and Irvine falls to his knees.  
  
Yuffie: *walks up to Irvine* Don't worry guy...I'll help you....Just gimmie your materia!!!!! *feels all around Irvine's coat*  
  
Irvine: AHH!!! *falls over*  
  
Squall: Are you looking for drugs?  
  
Yuffie: *walks up to Squall and looks him over* Where's the materia?  
  
Irvine: *shaking* We're not drug dealers....  
  
Yuffie: *innocent look* I don't recall materia being a drug... *moves her feet around sheepishly*  
  
Squall: What is this materia you speak of?  
  
Yuffie: Materia's great!! Its like, you take it and equip it in your weapons, and then everything goes WOOSH!!! *makes hand motions*  
  
Squall and Irvine start to laugh.  
  
Yuffie: And you use it to cure, and-  
  
Squall: *looks at the ground and snorts*   
  
Yuffie: Look at me when I'm talking to you!  
  
Irvine: Its definately drugs....  
  
Yuffie: But....Its used for magic!  
  
Squall: Ohhhh! You mean the junction. *hands Yuffie his gun blade, and points to a tiny tiny tiny tiny crystal* This controls the junction magic.  
  
Yuffie: No materia.......But...I used my ultima materia to kick Sephiroth's butt!! Ha-ha! Slice slice! and he was all like "AHHHHH!!!!" *puts her hand on her chest*  
  
Squall: Whats a Sephiroth?  
  
Irvine: *shrugs*  
  
Yuffie: Actually, he was an "Ancient", well, Aeris was an Ancient, and he had this long silver hair, and these creepy icy eyes, and he was all like, "you are puppets!"  
  
Irvine: *crazy look* *takes the gunblade from Squall* I have a gunblade! *points it at Yuffie*  
  
Yuffie: Oh, Is that what that is-Ack! *gets held in place by Squall*  
  
Irvine: *reaches for the trigger, when he realizes....* Its broken!!! Squall, did Rinoa get ahold of this?  
  
Squall: She was hugging it....  
  
Irvine: She completely smashed the trigger!  
  
Yuffie: *out of the blue* Gimmie a hug!! *hugs Squall*  
  
Squall: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!   
  
Irvine: AHG! *points the gun blade at Yuffie* Make it stop!!!  
  
Yuffie: I just want some materia! ..................*looks around*.................Peace???? Ugghh... I'm gonna KILL Cid, why'd he drop me here in this freaky land!?  
  
Irvine: O.O What do you have with the headmaster!?  
  
Yuffie: He....He dropped me out of an airplane!  
  
Irvine: Cid can pilot? How long has he been keeping that from us? But look how much damage has been done to your gun blade!!  
  
Squall: *looks and passes out*  
  
Yuffie: Oh, would ya look at that................There's gotta be materia somewhere!  
  
Irvine: Back!  
  
Yuffie: I just wanna-Ha-ha! *snatches the gun blade, runs out of the room, and drilling noises are heard*  
  
Squall: *gets up* Ugghh.....*hears the drilling and stares*  
  
Yuffie: *comes back* GUYS! I figured out how to equip materia! See? You just drill a hole here, and , and, and, and-  
  
Squall: My.....gun blade... *sniff*  
  
Yuffie: And isn't it great!? ^_^  
  
Irvine: *takes the gun blade* Yessssss! I know how to use this materia now.... DIE!! *points the blade at Yuffie*  
  
Yuffie: Umm...there's no spell called DIE!!, and I'll t.......e..........l..........l.......y.......o......u......a........n..........o........t.......h..........e.......r..........t.........h........i........n.......g..........  
  
Irvine: Yes.........slow....  
  
Yuffie: H....a.................s............t.........e! Heygimmiethatthingwoo-hoo!!  
*jumps on Irvine and reaches for the gun blade*  
  
Irvine: *tosses the gun blade to Squall and runs for the phone*  
  
Squall: Silence!!  
  
Yuffie: *makes angry hand motions* ...................................  
  
Irvine: Hello? Funny Farm? Do you take crazy people!?  
  
Yuffie: *recovers* How DARE you silence me?! *slapps Squall, and takes the gun blade*  
  
Squall: *glares at Yuffie*  
  
Yuffie: Woah.......this guy's like....ummm.......Manipulate! Dance my little minion!  
  
Squall: *waltzes with himself*  
  
Yuffie: Stop! You! *turns to Irvine* Manipulate! Dance for me!  
  
Irvine: *dances*  
  
Yuffie: *to the audience* Arn't we having fuuuuuuuuuuun? *makes everyone normal*  
  
Irvine: AHH! *takes 45 pills at once*  
  
Squall: I'm going to KILL you!!  
  
Yuffie: Is that asprin!? Did I tell you that you could take it!?  
  
Irvine: Girl.....I'd rather have Ultimecia, Adel and Seifer here all at once than YOU!!  
  
Yuffie: Ummm....Does that mean you're my friend!? ^_^  
  
Squall and Irvine: AGGHHHHH!!!  
  
Irvine: *slashes at Yuffie*  
  
Yuffie: MY HAIR!!!!!! Thats it!!! *walks outside*  
  
Squall: .............She....She's gone!!!  
  
Irvine: She's gone! *hugs Squall*  
  
Yuffie: *sneaks in* Gauntlet!! *blasts Irvine*  
  
Irvine: AGH!  
  
Squall: What have you done?!  
  
Yuffie: Bloodfest! *slapps Squall around*  
  
Funny Farm Person: *knocks on the door* This is the Funny Farm.   
  
Yuffie: *opens the door* Them!! They tried to kill me!! *points at Irvine and Squall*  
  
Funny Farm Person: Alright. *injects Irvine and Squall with tranquilizers, and carries them off*  
  
Squall: This......Isn't...Right!....  
  
Irvine: Heeelp meeeeeee..........  
  
Yuffie: *closes the door, and Squall and Irvine get taken away* I'm sorry you had to see that folks...but sometimes these things happen. Have a nice day! ^_^ ^_^ ^_^  
  
End Chapter One. ô¿ô  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	2. Modern Yoga.

Disclaimer: I own nothing and I'm too lazy to type this, so you can kiss my butt lawyer kisama! This was originally performed by Random Acts Of Insanity, see author profile for copyright info.  
  
Part 2- Modern Yoga.  
  
By Moi ô¿ô  
  
Aeris sits on the floor of a medium sized room, in the lotus position, meditating, when Tifa walks in, wearing her usual miniskirt.  
  
Tifa: Hiiii Aeris!! *dances around* I'm here for the yoga class! *playfully throws punches at Aeris, and sits down next to her*  
  
Aeris: *calmly and pleasantly surprised* Ohhh. You're here for the yoga class. Great.  
  
Tifa: Yep! Ya know, like "Boing" and some stuff! *can't sit still*  
  
Aeris: Tifa, the first part of yoga class is learning to be calllllllllm.  
  
Tifa: I'm calm I'm calm I'm calm!!  
  
Aeris: The next thing we must teach you is the lotus position.  
  
Tifa: In this dress? What are ya crazy? Psh!  
  
Aeris: Then what we must do is wait for the other students.  
  
Tifa: Ok other students! There's more?? Wow, Aeris you're getting yourself a real job! *slaps Aeris on the back*  
  
Zell wanders in.  
  
Tifa: *gets up, and jumps up and down* Hi! I'm Tifa!  
  
Zell: Is this the yoga class? *bounces on his toes*  
  
Aeris: Yes.  
  
Tifa: She told me I'm suppossed to be calm!  
  
Zell: Calm!? What's with that???  
  
Tifa: I know! I don't wanna be calm! I wanna be out there kicking monster butt! Ya know?  
  
Zell: I know what ya mean!! Yeah, yeah! Monsters! *throws real fast punches at the air*  
  
Tifa: Monsters!! *clapps*  
  
Aeris: *still in the lotus position* And what would your name be?  
  
Zell: Zell.  
  
Tifa: Zell! HI!!   
  
Zell: *jumps in circles*  
  
Aeris: Zell, nice to meet you.  
  
Tifa: *points to Aeris* SHE wanted me to try the lotus position in this dress!  
  
Zell: Not in that! ...........Well....Unless you really want to...*looks Tifa over*  
  
Tifa: *uppercuts Zell*  
  
Zell: *stumbles*  
  
Aeris: Tifa, don't abuse the other students.   
  
Tifa: Ok. *sits down and cross her legs* Ohm and some stuff like that!  
  
Zell: *sits down next to Tifa*  
  
Tifa: OhhhhhhhhhhhhhhmmmmmmmOK! *gets up* I'm ready for some action! *gasp* What's this!?!??! *picks up something that looks almost like a flute*  
  
Aeris: That't the modified Princess Guard. It only makes beautiful refreshing sounds.  
  
::CRASH!!!!!!::  
  
Zell: *gets up and walks out of the room*  
  
Tifa: WOAH! I knew there were monsters around here!!!  
  
::CRASH!!!!!!::  
  
Tifa: Tifa! There's a monster and I'm gonna kick his butt!  
  
Aeris: I'm Aeris.  
  
Tifa: Whatever, Aeris! How DARE you try to steal me name!! *whaps Aeris n the forehead*  
  
Aeris: *gets up*  
  
Tifa: I'm gonna kick his butt for you!  
  
Zell: *comes back*  
  
Aeris: We must me calm.  
  
Zell: Monster! Monster!  
  
Aeris: Calm.  
  
Zell: Big!  
  
Aeris: Calm down.  
  
Tifa: No! Don'y be calm! Zell, go kick his butt with me!!  
  
Zell and Tifa run out of the room, and screaming is heard.  
  
Aeris: NO! You have to be ohm-y and calm!  
  
Tifa: OH man!! That hurts!  
  
Zell: Oh! Agony!  
  
Aeris: *sits on the floor and crosses her arms* This is not calm, this is definately NOT calm.....  
  
Zell runs in and starts jumping around.  
  
Aeris: *picks up her Princess Guard* You! Be calm! *hits Zell*  
  
Zell: *runs back into the monster room*  
  
Tifa: Aeris! HELP!!!  
  
Aeris: *walks into he monster room* Monster, BE CALM!! *whaps it again and again*  
  
::Monster crys in background::  
  
Tifa and Zell run outr of the monster room.  
  
Tifa: She like, saved us! Oh my gosh!  
  
Zell: Woo-hoo!  
  
Aeris: This is the monster that was assulting the both of you? *carries a little Barbie horse into the room*  
  
Tifa: Yes! That's the very same one!! Ha! *grabs the horse* That'll teach you to beat us up!! *hands it to Aeris*  
  
Aeris: *takes it* Be calm! *whaps it, and it falls to the floor*  
  
Zell: What is wrong with you?!?!?!?!? *picks up the horse, shakes it and and throws it out the window*  
  
Aeris: Be calm! *whaps Zell*   
  
Zell: *stands there*  
  
Aeris: Be calm! *whaps Zell again*  
  
Zell: *stands there*  
  
Aeris: Be calm! *whaps Zell yet again*  
  
Zell: *stands there*  
  
Tifa: *glances at the cue cards* Zell falls down! *pushes Zell over*  
  
Aeris: Be calm! *whaps Tifa*  
  
Tifa: Ack! *falls to the floor*  
  
Aeris: And THAT my friends is the first lesson in yoga!  
  
Tifa: *gets up and kicks Aeris in the head*  
  
Aeris: Aggh!! *falls over*  
  
Tifa: *looks over at Zell, and kicks him in the head*  
  
Zell: Ack! *falls over*  
  
Tifa: This is my class now! *dances and sings* My class, yeah yeah! *kicks Zell again* HAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!!  
  
Aeris: *gets up* Tifa? Be calm!!! *whaps her*  
  
Tifa: Uggh! *falls*  
  
Zell: *gets up*   
  
Aeris: You too! *whaps Zell*  
  
Zell: Uggh! *falls*  
  
Aeris: *walks up to the audience* And thank you friends for joining us in this lesson of Modern Yoga. Our first lesson is "Ohhhmmm."  
  
Tifa: Oww and some stuff like that..............  
  
End Chapter 2. ô¿ô  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	3. Guardian Force VS Summon Deathmatch

Disclaimer: Own nothing do I (except for part of the soon to be TV show Random Acts of Insanity!!! See author profile for copyright info) and own nothing do you (not even part of anything). Fair enough? ^_^ Good.  
  
Part 3- Guardian Force/Summon Deathmatch  
  
~It is a beautiful sunny day, only you can't tell cuz we're inside the Gold Saucer. ^_^ Anyways, big events have been happening lately, and today in the battle arena, (where a little mini stadium has been installed) the fight of the century is about to take place!~  
  
Moi Ã´Â¿Ã´: *from the announcer's booth* WELCOME!! To the Summon and Guardian Force Deathmatch! We're here to find out who's more powerful! The slightly pixilated, though always useful Summons? Or could it be the 3D but pompous Guardian Forces?? We'll find out today!  
  
~From one door, Summon Shiva walks out, and GF Shiva from the other~  
  
Moi Ã´Â¿Ã´: And it looks like our first match is Shiva versus....erk...Shiva!!!  
  
~BING!~  
  
S Shiva: WHAT!? How is it that YOU wear less clothes than me!? I'm the best looking here!  
  
GF Shiva: Please.....your hips are a trocious, that....pixil- ness....*shudder*  
  
S Shiva: What? Is it cold in here?  
  
GF Shiva: Not YET!! *blasts S Shiva with icecicles*  
  
S Shiva: o.o Meep! *runs behind GF Shiva*  
  
Moi Ã´Â¿Ã´: GF Shiva is trying to dodge, but her pixil resolution is too high!!!  
  
GF Shiva: *slow motion* N........o..........o........!.......!........!......  
  
S Shiva: I was designed for this world, baby.  
  
Moi Ã´Â¿Ã´: *calls the janitor* Can we increase the resolution any?  
  
Janitor: Sure. *pulls a lever, and GF Shiva starts moving normally*  
  
S Shiva: NOT FAIR!!! *blasts the announcer's booth, and an icecicle breaks the window*  
  
Moi Ã´Â¿Ã´: O.O MEEP!!! *ducks*  
  
GF Shiva: EEEEEEEEE!!!! *starts slapping S Shiva and what little she is wearing falls off*  
  
S Shiva: My clothes!!!!!  
  
~The men in the audience drool~  
  
Moi Ã´Â¿Ã´: AHHH! *shields eyes* I have a girlfriend!!!!  
  
S Shiva: I'm nakey!! HELP!! *runs in circles*  
  
~The drool floods onto the battle floor, and S Shiva steps in it~  
  
S Shiva: Oh, GROSS! Just when I got my toe nails painted! And after all that, I....uh-oh.....  
  
~The drool starts to freeze S Shiva~  
  
S Shiva: *teeth chatter* This isn't fair!  
  
~GF Shiva glances at Moi Ã´Â¿Ã´ who gives her a thumbs up sign~  
  
GF Shiva: According to him it is.  
  
S Shiva: Noooooooooooooooo-*ching!*  
  
Moi Ã´Â¿Ã´: And it looks like our High Resolution Beauty is the victor for round one!  
  
GF Shiva: *blows everyone kisses*  
  
Moi Ã´Â¿Ã´: Well be back soon, so stay tuned for round two!!  
  
~+~+~+~+~+~+Commercial Break+~+~+~+~+~+~  
  
~Yuffie appears on the screen~  
  
Yuffie: Hello, friends. Do you find collecting materia difficult? Well, fret no more! I have a new solution to your problems........*drum roll*.........The Sticky-Fingers Materia Collector! How does it work? Thats for me to know, and you to find out.....heheheheheh...*pulls out a cute little robot*  
  
SFMC: *starts beeping* De-stroy.....De-stroy....Collect materia for Mistress Yuffie.....  
  
Yuffie: Erm! *hides it behind her back* Buy one today! They're only 5,000 Gil!!  
  
SFMC: *wiggles free, and attacks the camera person*  
  
Camera Person: AGHHH!! GET IT OFF ME!!!!  
  
Yuffie: O.o Err.....Just buy one today.....  
  
~+~+~+~+~+~+End Commercial Break+~+~+~+~+~+~  
  
Moi Ã´Â¿Ã´: We're BACK and its round two!! Our next match up is-  
  
Security Guard: Back! Get Back!  
  
Tyleet (ID 24000): Get Moi Ã´Â¿Ã´! He'll know me!  
  
Moi Ã´Â¿Ã´: Go away, Brutus, let her in. ^_^  
  
Tyleet: Hi, Moi Ã´Â¿Ã´! I'm here to help you announce.  
  
Moi Ã´Â¿Ã´: ^_^ Alrighty then. *hands Tyleet some headphones and a mic* As I was saying, our next match features-  
  
Tyleet: Alexander versus Alexander!!  
  
Moi Ã´Â¿Ã´: It looks like Summon Alexander is rising out of the ground, but where is GF Alexander?  
  
~Knock Knock~  
  
Moi Ã´Â¿Ã´: *gets the door* Whaaaa?  
  
Mailperson: This is a telegram.  
  
Moi Ã´Â¿Ã´: I can see that....*takes it and walks back to his seat* It seems that GF Alexander couldn't make it off of his little island in the middle of nowhere.....  
  
Tyleet: That means that Summon Alexander wins this match! That leaves the Summons and Guardian Forces tied 1 to 1!  
  
Moi Ã´Â¿Ã´: Our next match features ugly versus ugly!  
  
Tyleet: Freakish versus freakish!  
  
Moi Ã´Â¿Ã´ and Tyleet: Typoon versus Pandemona!  
  
Moi Ã´Â¿Ã´: They're coming through the gates. Out of door number one......The Tornado Terrorist....and the only monser with a head on his butt.......Typoon!!  
  
Audience: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!!!  
  
Tyleet: And out of door number two....erk....erm...If I knew what he/she is, I'd let you know, ladies and gentlemen. Here's Pandemona!!  
  
Audience: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!!!  
  
~BING!~  
  
Typoon: I'm gonna pluck each one of your feathers bird boy! Er...girl...whatever you are!  
  
Typoon(butt-head): *belches*  
  
Pandemona: ..........  
  
Typoon: No objections I see!  
  
Pandemona: *starts vac-ing things right and left, the spits it all at Typoon*  
  
Tyleet: It looks like Pandemona's got Typoon in peril!  
  
Typoon: Oh no, Mommy! The big purple ELEPHANT is trying to hurt me!!!  
  
Pandemona: !!!!!!!!! *stopps vac-ing*  
  
Moi Ã´Â¿Ã´: Ooooo! That was a low blow!  
  
~Pandemona lurches toward Typoon~  
  
Tyleet: This could be it, folks!!!  
  
~Pandemona beats on Typoon~  
  
Moi Ã´Â¿Ã´: Shut your eyes, all you squeemish people....this isn't pretty...  
  
Typoon: Mommy!!!  
  
~The sky turns purple~  
  
Tyleet: Umm....Moi Ã´Â¿Ã´?  
  
Moi Ã´Â¿Ã´: *looks* What the?  
  
Audience: o.o  
  
Pandemona: *stops beating up Typoon* ?????  
  
~A big purple monster with 3 heads, that resembles Typoon (only it wears lipstick, and a blond wig) and is twice as big as Pandemona appears from the sky~  
  
Typoon: Mommy! ^_^  
  
Pandemona: *backs away for a few seconds, the breaks into a run that shakes the stadium*  
  
Audience: YA-Y-YA-Y-YA-Y!!!!!  
  
Typoon's Mom: You won't beat up on my little Ty anymore!!! *grabs Pandemona and hurls him/her into the sky*  
  
Pandemona: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Moi Ã´Â¿Ã´: Woo-hoo! That wraps up round two!!  
  
Tyleet: Umm....Moi Ã´Â¿Ã´? I just got a note from the judges.....  
  
Moi Ã´Â¿Ã´: What do they want?  
  
Tyleet: They say that the match was unfair since Typoon called his mom, so they're awarding half a point to each side.  
  
Moi Ã´Â¿Ã´: But the audience's drool froze Summon Shiva!!  
  
Tyleet: They were out to lunch and can't comment on that.  
  
Moi Ã´Â¿Ã´: %$@^#!!!!!-::CENSORED::  
  
~+~+~+~+~+~+Commercial Break+~+~+~+~+~+~  
  
~Flayme (ID 41905) appears on screen~  
  
Flayme: Heeeeeelo everyone! Are you tired of trying to be convincingly evil when you have angel wings popping out of your back?? Well here's your solution!! Wing-b-Gone! Yes, Wing-b-Gone gives you the full extent of wing- affecting lepracy in a bottle.  
  
Rinoa: *walks on stage* Wing-b-Gone saved me from my Angel Wing limit break! It was hard on the team, me going berserk and throwing away items and such.  
  
~Bahamut runs across the screen, wingless, and crying~  
  
Flayme: Err....Yeah! That just shows you how well it works! =)  
  
Rinoa: *waves to the camera, and makes faces*  
  
~+~+~+~+~+~+End Commercial Break+~+~+~+~+~+~  
  
Moi Ã´Â¿Ã´: NO GOOD LOUSY-And we're back! The Guardian Forces and the Summons are still tied.  
  
Tyleet: I wouldn't leave this this match of my house was on fire!  
  
Moi Ã´Â¿Ã´: Its time for our main event!!!  
  
Tyleet: I corner number one.....the invincible....incredible...Knights Of The Round!!!!  
  
Knights: *wave*  
  
Audience: ::Cheer::  
  
Moi Ã´Â¿Ã´: And in the other corner.....the biggest baddest, and so big we had to shrink him so he wouldn't put the Earth out of orbit....EDEN!!  
  
~Eden appears, and everyone grows silent in awe~  
  
Eden: What? Did I come naked or something?  
  
Kights: ????  
  
Moi Ã´Â¿Ã´: Erm....the all powerful Eden has cracked a joke.....  
  
Tyleet: Let the match begin!!!  
  
~BING!~  
  
Knight 13 (the leader): Alright, men! This is it! Tonight we will go into battle with that....erm...HIM! *points to Eden*  
  
Eden: Hey! Its rude to point.  
  
Knight 4: Sir! Oooo! Sir! *raises his hand*  
  
Knight 13: Yes, what is it?  
  
Kight 4: Can I have a popcicle?  
  
Kight 13: AFTER we destroy the-  
  
Knight 2: 4 has a point. This place is hot....  
  
Knight 6: I want some cheese.  
  
Knight 8: Where's the potty?  
  
Knight 13: -_-'''' MOVE OUT!!!  
  
~The knights move in on Eden, and climb up its surface~  
  
Eden: HAHAHAHAHAA!! Stop!! That tickles!! HAHAHAHAA!  
  
Knight 1: Sir! I broke-d my axe!!  
  
Knight 13: Hurry, men! We haven't much time! *waltzes up to the top of Eden*  
  
Knight 5: *gets sucked up Eden's nose* !!!!!!  
  
Knight 7: *rescues Knight 5*  
  
Knight 9: I hurt my pinky toe!  
  
Eden: Oh brother......  
  
~Eden's speaking shakes the knights around~  
  
Knight 11: *stands up* When do we get paid for this?  
  
Knight 13: Erm....you don't.  
  
Knights 1-12: WHAT!?!?!?  
  
Knight 13: You're all a bunch of bumbling idiots! I'm finding new knights!  
  
Knight 6: I still want some cheese.  
  
Knight 1: Oh, shut up, and let's just kill 13 already!  
  
~The knights gather around Knight 13 in the center of Eden's head~  
  
Eden: *sarcasm* -_-''''' There's gotta be an easier way to win..................*shoots the big laser beam from his head*  
  
Knights: AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!  
  
Knight 6: CHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESE!!!!!  
  
~The laser bounces off the stadium lights~  
  
Audience: *looks left* looks right* *looks left* looks right* *looks left* looks right* *looks left* looks right* *looks left* looks right* *looks left* looks right* *looks left* looks right* *looks left* looks right* *looks left* looks right* *looks left* looks right* *looks left* looks right* *looks left* looks right* *looks left* looks right*  
  
~The laser hits Eden in the face~  
  
Eden: @#$@$!!!!! *falls over, and causes an earthquake*  
  
Moi Ã´Â¿Ã´: *drags Tyleet out of the announcer's booth, and out of the stadium* Run for your LIVES!!!  
  
~The stadium collapses, and a few minutes later, the dust cloud settles~  
  
Moi Ã´Â¿Ã´: Erm...*gets back on his microphone* Ladies and gentlemen.......this has been the Guardian Force Versus Summon Deathmatch!  
  
Rabid Fans: HOLD IT!  
  
Tyleet: What's there to hold?  
  
Rabid Fans: Who the hell won?!?!  
  
Moi Ã´Â¿Ã´: I....that is.....*bolts in a random direction, and hopes he makes it to the cable car*  
  
Tyleet: o.o *looks back to the rabid fans* Hehehehe ^_^  
  
Rabid Fans: So who won??  
  
Tyleet: Umm....*points to Moi Ã´Â¿Ã´* What he said! *bolts*  
  
~Tyleet and Moi Ã´Â¿Ã´ get chased away by the Rabid Fans~  
  
End Chapter 3! Ã´Â¿Ã´ 


	4. Students From HELL X_x

Person 1: What did you do now?  
  
Moi ô¿ô: Nothing. What everyone is about to see is nothing ^_^  
  
Person 1: Suuuuuuure it's nothing...  
  
Moi ô¿ô: It's only the final chapter of this story. What could be closer to nothing?  
  
Person 1: -_-' I have no clue....  
  
(This was first performed by the cast of Random Acts Of Insanity, done ALL improv, except for the main plot)  
  
Disclaimer: Moi ô¿ô owns nothing mentioned in this fic, except part of the soon to be TV show, Random Acts Of Insanity!  
  
(PS!!!!!!!!!!!- Aeris doesn't know Yuffie in this fic!!!!)  
  
Final Part- Students From HELL  
  
~Aeris Gainsborough....She decided that after the fighting. She just couldn't take it anymore- ~  
  
Aeris: ^_^ *peace sign*  
  
~- so she decided to be.....A teacher.~  
  
Quistis: *interviews Aeris, and writes things down on a clipboard that reads "Seifer is a dick"* And your name is?  
  
Aeris: Aeris Gainsborough.  
  
Quistis: And your age?  
  
Aeris: 22.  
  
Quistis: Why do you think you're qualified for this job?  
  
Aeris: Well, I have lots of experience saving the world, and I think that that's what this establishment is all about.  
  
Quistis: Ok. Can you tell me something about yourself?  
  
Aeris: Well, I'm normally the quiet, compassionate, loving type, so all the fighting has just-  
  
Squall: *from outside of the room* NO! That's not true! You come back here and say that to my FACE!!!!  
  
Aeris: Umm...^_^''' Interesting students you have, here.  
  
Quistis: Well, You have the job. Can you start now?  
  
Aeris: Sure! ^_^ *goes to get her supplies*  
  
Quistis: *makes sure Aeris is out of earshot* Oh, God...I can't stand another day with those brats!!!.........TIME FOR SOME SAKE!!!! ^_____^  
  
~The next day, Aeris is preparing herself for her first day of work.~  
  
Aeris: Ok...I've got my lesson plans...My lucky rose pen....I'm a teacher! I can do this! This is gonna be fun. ^_^  
  
~Inside the classroom...~  
  
Yuffie: *tries to grab Squall's gunblade* Gimmie your gunblade! I wanna fix it!  
  
Squall: You stay away from me!  
  
Yuffie: But I need to put materia in it!!  
  
Squall: Whaaaat!?  
  
Yuffie: That's the only way it'll be cool! Then you'll have all these cool magic spells!  
  
Aeris: *walks in* Good morning, class! ^_^  
  
Squall: Don't put drugs in it- Hi!  
  
Aeris: Good morning, I'm your new teacher, Miss Gainsborough.  
  
Squall: What happened to the other teacher?  
  
Aeris: Miss Trepe? I don't know...I-  
  
~Zell walks in, late, listening to headphones, slaps Yuffie on the forehead and goes to sit behind Squall.~  
  
Zell: Yo, teach! Hey...You're not Quistis....  
  
Yuffie: HEY!! You're mean!!!  
  
Aeris: Hello, students. My name is Miss Gainsborough, and I'm going to be your new teacher.  
  
Yuffie: Aren't you going to punish him!!! *points to Zell, who is bobbing his head to a song on his CD player* He's LATE! He's really really late!  
  
Aeris: Its ok, I was a little late, myself, and seeing as it's my first day....Alright! Let's start off with introductions.  
  
Zell: *kicks Squall in the back*  
  
Squall: *turns around*  
  
Zell: *waves*  
  
Aeris: You, what's your name?  
  
Yuffie: I'm Yuffie!! ^_^  
  
Zell: *throws a spitball at Squall*  
  
Aeris: Yuffie.....Hey, you in the back with it headphones! What are you doing?  
  
Zell: *innocent look* Studying.  
  
Aeris: What did you just throw at the boy in front of you?  
  
Zell: Nothing ^_^  
  
Aeris: I realize that this is my first day, but I'm afraid I'm going to have to crack down on you just a little bit.  
  
Squall: *writes something in his notebook*  
  
Aeris: And what would your name be?  
  
Zell: Zell Dincht. *lifts up Squall's gunblade and makes a stabbing motion*  
  
Aeris: Mr. Dincht?  
  
Yuffie: SQUALL! Watch out!  
  
Squall: *turns around* That is MINE!  
  
Aeris: I.umm.  
  
Yuffie: It STILL needs materia in it!  
  
Squall: You stay away from me with your drugs!!!  
  
Aeris: Class?  
  
Yuffie: Its not drugs! It's magic!  
  
Aeris: I would like-  
  
Zell: You left the door open!  
  
Aeris: *closes door* No I didn't. I would like you all-  
  
Yuffie: *points* It's still open!!  
  
Squall: *writes in his notebook*  
  
Aeris: Thank you Miss..I didn't catch your last name.  
  
Yuffie: Why do you need to know my last name?  
  
Zell: Kisaragi.  
  
Squall: *turns around to Zell* Oh, and you would know everything...  
  
Aeris: *to Squall* And your name?  
  
Squall: Whatever...  
  
Zell: His name's Squall Leonhart..He's a pansy! ^_^ *ruffles Squall's hair*  
  
Yuffie: Heeheehee!  
  
Aeris: Thank you for-  
  
Squall: Touch NOT the hair!  
  
Zell: *makes faces* =() o.O =P ^_^ *_*  
  
Aeris: Mr. Dincht!  
  
Zell: ^_^ Yes m'am?  
  
Aeris: *sigh* Never mind.. Ok, I don't have very informative lesson plans, so if anyone would like to volunteer some help, then I would be very happy.  
  
Zell: *writes "Squall Sux" on a piece of paper and crumples it*  
  
Aeris: Mr. Dincht!!  
  
Zell: Yes m'am? *throws the paper at Squall and misses* AGG! You were three inches in front of me and I missed!!!! *shakes Squall*  
  
Aeris: O-K..  
  
Squall: If you'll excuse me, I have to go back to writing my list.  
  
Everyone: List?  
  
....  
  
Yuffie: HE'S WRITING A HIT LIST!!!!  
  
Zell: Suspend him! SUSPEND him!!!  
  
Yuffie: I feel threatened!!!!  
  
Aeris: Considering his current conditions, I think I may be able to forgive him for this.  
  
Yuffie: You can't say that! You're a teacher!  
  
Aeris: *throws crumpled paper at Yuffie* YES I CAN!!!! ...I mean.  
  
Yuffie: Help! Help! I'm being repressed!  
  
Aeris: ^_^''''' OKAAAAAAY!!! Let's start the class with a little yoga lesson, SHALL WE!?!?  
  
Squall: *hands Aeris his "hit list" with a proud grin*  
  
Zell: *continues to throw paper at Squall*  
  
Yuffie: You're supposed to read them! You're supposed to read them!  
  
Aeris: *reads list* Kill Zell, kill weird drug girl, die die, die, die, die, don't kill teacher..  
  
Yuffie: IT STILL NEEDS MATERIA!!  
  
Aeris: SILENCE, CLASS!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Squall: *falls out of chair*  
  
Aeris: I mean...please be quiet...  
  
.....  
  
~Silence is broken by the sound of tearing paper~  
  
Aeris: Mr. Dincht?  
  
Zell: Yes, M'am?  
  
Aeris: May I have your-  
  
Zell: Sure! *spitballs Aeris*  
  
Aeris: No. I want your-  
  
Zell: *spitballs again*  
  
Aeris: Ok...the next person to throw something is going to get suspended..  
  
Squall: *finally reads one of Zell's crumpled papers* I'M Going to KILL YOU!!!! *gets his gunblade*  
  
Zell & Yuffie: DEATH THREATS!  
  
Squall: I was warranted!!!!  
  
Aeris: Mr. Leonhart?  
  
Squall: *manic* YESSSSSS? ^_^  
  
Aeris: Please hand me your sword...  
  
Squall: WHYYYYYY?  
  
Yuffie: It needs materia! Tell him to fix it!!!!  
  
Aeris: Please...Hand me the sword..  
  
Zell: *snatches it and throws it at Aeris*  
  
Aeris: O.O  
  
~The gunblade sticks in the wall~  
  
Squall: *turns to Zell* YOOOOUUU!!!  
  
Yuffie: Is the teacher gonna put materia in it??  
  
Aeris: ~_~ Mr. Leonhart! May I please have Mr. Dincht's notebook?  
  
Zell: *takes everyone's notebook and throws them all at Aeris*  
  
Aeris: *dodges the notebooks in time, but gets hit by a paper airplane* I..I.I.*tears up the airplane*  
  
Zell: Destruction of property!!! *points at Aeris*  
  
Yuffie: Gee.You're not very nice..  
  
Zell: *decides to choke Squall*  
  
Squall: Ack!  
  
Aeris: *sits on the floor and starts to meditate*  
  
Yuffie: What's the teacher doing?  
  
Zell: Hey, Leonhart! What's the teacher doing?  
  
Squall: Ack! *can't breathe*  
  
Yuffie: Is she broken??  
  
Zell: *lets go of Squall* FLOWER!! *hold up Aeris's pen*  
  
Squall: *pokes Aeris in the forehead*  
  
Aeris: *wakes up instantly* GET THE HELL OFF OF MY PEN!  
  
Yuffie: *takes the pen* Oh, Zell! I didn't know you cared!  
  
Zell: I don't!  
  
Aeris: Miss Kisaragi, give me my pen...  
  
Yuffie: But it's so pretty! ^_^ *hugs it*  
  
Zell: I have to hurry! This way! He's gotta be stopped! Otherwise-  
  
Yuffie: Whatcha reading?  
  
Zell: Manga!!  
  
Squall and Yuffie: MANGA!?!?!? ^_________^  
  
Zell: Everyone gather 'round!  
  
Yuffie: I LOVE Fushigi Yugi!  
  
Squall: NAKEDNESS!!!  
  
Aeris: There shall be no porn in my classroom! *takes the manga book*  
  
Yuffie: It's not porn! Its manga, DUH!!  
  
Zell: What's wrong with this teacher anyway?  
  
Squall: I dunno..  
  
Aeris: ALRIGHT THEN!  
  
Squall: *gets up and leaves*  
  
Aeris: O.o WHERE are you going? Mr. Leonhart! I don't believe you have permission to leave this class!  
  
Yuffie: *gets out poker cards and shuffles them*  
  
Zell: *spitballs Aeris again*  
  
Aeris: *is falling apart* Breathe..breathe...  
  
Squall: *comes back with a can of Moogle Moogle Cola and sits down*  
  
Zell: *plays poker* Hit me! HIT ME!!  
  
Yuffie: *hits Zell*  
  
Zell: OWW! My hair!!!  
  
Yuffie: You told me to hit you!!  
  
Squall: *gargles the cola*  
  
Zell: THAT'S...AGHHH! *pushes Yuffie away and throws the cards in the air*  
  
Yuffie: MY CARDS!!!  
  
Aeris: Nice cards..NOW PUT THEM AWAY!  
  
Yuffie: I don't wanna!!!  
  
Zell: *hits Squall in the back of the head* Stop gargling!!  
  
Squall: *spits his cola all over Aeris*  
  
Aeris: O.O !!!!!  
  
Yuffie: HAHAHAHHAAA!! Nice one Squall!  
  
Zell: Encore!!!  
  
Aeris: *puts her head in her hands and cries*  
  
Squall: *wipes his mouth*  
  
Aeris: *weep*  
  
Yuffie: Hey, teacher lady! Are you ok?  
  
Zell: What's wrong with her?  
  
Squall: Is she dying?  
  
Aeris: ;_; Ahhhhhh!!! *weeps*  
  
Zell: Wanna go get some hot dogs?!?  
  
Yuffie: YEAH!! WOOOO!!!  
  
Squall: WOOOOO!!!  
  
~The evil spwan-of-satan students exit the classroom~  
  
Aeris: I give up...  
  
~Later..~  
  
Quistis: *drinks sake while lounging on a heavily padded leather chair* Ahhhh..This is the life ^_^ *happy sip*  
  
Aeris: *scrambles in* I can't take it! I can't take it! I quit! I quit I quit I QUIT!!  
  
Quistis: *throws her sake across the room* WHAT!??! NOOO!! No! You can't leave!!! *latches on to Aeris's leg*  
  
Aeris: T-Take the confiscated cards..T-Take the porn! Take the notebooks! *drops it all on Quistis*  
  
Quistis: You can't leave! We need so much help around here!!!!!  
  
Aeris: Take your lesson plans and text books!!  
  
~Zell and Squall walk by and enter the office~  
  
Zell: Hi, teacher lady!! ^_^  
  
Squall: *takes Aeris's picture* For the record.  
  
Aeris: Take my lucky pen.You're GONNA NEED IT!!!  
  
Zell: *spitballs Aeris*  
  
Aeris: GET THE HELL AWAY FROM ME!!! I DON'T WORK HERE ANYMORE!!!  
  
Quistis: *weeps on the floor*  
  
Zell: *glomps Aeris*  
  
Aeris: *grabs a sword from the lost and found* I can't take it..I'm gone! And if I ever see you again.I will kill you so fast that you won't even know who your mother is!!  
  
Squall and Zell: *shrug* We don't know anyway.  
  
Aeris: *steps over the weeping Quistis* You have my pity..  
  
Squall: *takes a picture of Quistis*  
  
THE END!!!! ô¿ô 


End file.
